social.noyu.me

one of those things that follows naturally from my current philosophical bent that feels a bit too spicy to outright say is that basically every form of deviation from the norm has to exist, and the spiciness comes in the examples like, for example, the world needs insane people

and that's easy to stomach if you assume i mean people who are “a little bit insane” but i do also mean whatever the most uncomfortable kind of insanity you can imagine is. i think you can't eliminate that from this world without upsetting the balance of all things

the normie version of this take is that without adhd autist depressed schizos you don't get any cool art and that's entirely correct but it goes way, way, way deeper than that

what's messing with me is i'm genuinely not sure how radical a belief this is, because i think this is an underlying part of a lot of normie belief systems, they just can't actually bring themselves to say it. like… Christians believe murder should exist, OBVIOUSLY, and yet

‪like Christianity's view of the world (which i must add i feel very qualified to comment on because i grew up a genuine believer and later lost my faith and became an apostate) requires, even loves, the existence of all the things it claims to decry. they're horny for Satan‬

‪at the same time though there's a lot of people who, if given the chance to press a button that would make insane people disappear from the world forever, actually would, and spend a lot of time arguing with others about where the threshold should be, and they deeply terrify me‬

‪this feels spicy to me because of how serious i am about it and how non-moralistic it is, which are particularly hard to convey. i think if i animatedly explained it in person, in full detail, to the right kind of guy, they'd recall in horror and tell me i deserve death‬

‪but just reading my words on twitter you are only going to construct the most mild and acceptable form of this idea in your head, perhaps. i don't know‬

‪from a Christian perspective i am already insane, but they would not use that word, for it is a psychological and spiritual immune response that gets categorised as “evil” to avoid having to understand it‬

you know how Satanism in its most widely understood form is not a real religion? it's a strawman religion that Christians invent so they can avoid understanding the Other. it's spiritually, psychologically necessary for them to believe that the Other believes in hell

‪but i don't believe in hell, or heaven. there are hells and there are heavens on this earth, but not in the classical sense. i believe only in the cold embrace of death. and i believe that death is a good thing.‬

at the same time i believe that god is real, and i could spend a long time pretending to be christian without ever lying, but i would also not be telling the truth, because this reality only exists in one of my many contradictory belief systems